Dimp adds fifth wheel to electoral dumptruck

Dave decided that iMerika© was not completely well-represented by his candidate-selves unless he added a nebulous presence in a fine suit.

Momentum accelerates as Dimp vies with self for top slot

Dimp covers own flanks with crackpot doily by running as independents

Left and Right inside-out and upside down again!

Dave's positions:

Eye-Wrack: Evil is afoot either home or abroad and we as a nation must burn it at the stake!

Health Care: "More demons, and wearing latex gloves!"

Abortion: "There is a conspiracy of fetuses to destroy free enterprise!"

Religion: "I am the tin funnel of all truth, divine or otherwise!"

The Budget: "Idle hands, unless they have an excuse, are the workshop of sinfulness! Tax the power-elite fetuses!"

iMerika's relationship with Russia: "The only way to face this menace is to bomb or vote ourselves back to the Stone Age!"

Dimp cannonades chapeau into Circus Minimus!

Dave believes the bestest strategy is to run up against himself sidewise

Dave's platforms:

Eye-Wrack: "Declare a time-out, withdraw the troops, apologize to everyone, and then re-invade the place again but this time do it the right way!"

Health Care: "I care that everyone should get healthy!"

Abortion: "I believe in self-determination--give the fetuses the vote and let them decide--democratically!"

Religion: "I am the Lord Jeebus but I have absolutely no faith in myself! I am a Evangelical Vegetable-aryan; I believe in separation of churches and steaks!"

The Budget: "The government should buy its toilet paper and missiles at Wal-Mart and save a big bundle!"

iMerika's© relationship with Russia: "The only good Commie is dead!"

Doktor Yulaska to speak at NTC

A MySpacery Bulletin magically transferred to this Bloggery!

This is a first and commemorable--a repostage of a bulletin that initially burst upon the virtua-scene on our own Interknittery here on Erde. The electro-alchemical transmogrification from Erden Interknit-ese to Urth Inter-nuttery required some shimmying, jerry-rigging, and a number of horseless carriage jacks (all virtual to be sure, save one) but seemingly the effort was successful!

This speaking event taking place at the Tribal College (similar to an Urth "Community College") down the pathway a piece from the Institute is hosted by the school's Algonkian Tabula Razor Club whose membership is also the unsubtle demon-energy behind the Algonkian Harpoon--a humoristical and satyrical pamphlet that we hereabouts all relish mightily. The "Abu Uban" guest speaker is no doubt a full-bore sham as no institution of higher learning in Abu Ubu (the angriest little nation on Erde--the motto is on their postal stamps!) has stood untampered upon its foundations long enough for it to matriculate a single individual, let alone staff itself. Controversy is the mutton and cabbage of the Abu Ubu populace and few things that take a firm position--if even only as a specific location in a landscape--are left unscathed by incendiaries or explosives. Political mayhem and homicide is such a part of the daily woof and wobble of Abu Ubu existence that voting events officially have been dubbed assasselections with the winner being in every sense the survivor of the balloting and the bulleting.

Noam Yulaska--putatively a prize-winning bug specialist turned socio-political omni-seer--is no doubt a spoof of someone although who specifically I am not certain. The yootful set--my daughters tandem exemplars--is particular swept-upward these days by the absurdities of life upon your world--da Urth--and we've already witnessed a panoply of Urth-themed masques, marionette-shows, and pantomimes, mostly double-over hilarious. Perhaps the echo-worldly amusement trend is continued here. Regardless, the evening with this Yulaska goober will undoubtedly be a hoot.