Intern Lambasted for Honesty Brutality and Vicious Truthfulnesses

Edward Armouralle, the Naughty "Intern"

Despite stern admonitions--a Prime Directive of sorts--to never "tell it like it is" when answering mail from our Echo World of "Urth," our not-so-young chain-smoking intern did so (in a lengthy discoursing that trod upon the overinflated shoes of nearly every clown, buffoon, and village idiot on that woe-begone planet) and was, as punishment, transferred to the new Murketing Department where he will supervise the staff and edit the brilliant contributions of the talented crew of baboons who are now hard at work brainstorming away there. Armouralle will be further chastised with a substantial pay raise (forcing him into a higher tax bracket) and a long paid vacation: a palpable warning to all Institute personnel that there is a limit to our tolerance of calling it as one sees it in front of the youngsters. We hope to reassure our loyal readership "over there" that we are in total congruence with your views, as laughable as they all are. We emphatically don't intend to place at jeopardy our circulation numbers and lucrative advertising sales income with non-entertaining controversy, uncomfortable cerebrations, and "boring"--as you describe most things that fail to make you chortle and touch your toes--polysyllabic proclamations!